Anyone would think it was me going away to a jam packed full week of freshers' events at uni in a couple of weeks' time. I wish it was. Beach parties, film shows, tea parties, chocolate tasting, wine tasting, scuba diving, Buddhist meditation, mask making, quizzes, radio DJ-ing, ghost tours, treasure hunts... I want to do it all! And, thankfully, so does a socially-starved Ben. Blimey if he doesn't make some great friends within that first week I'll eat my hat!
And, hopefully, during this packed schedule he will find time to eat properly. A fellow ED mum suggested I pack a few pre-frozen meals to see Ben through those first few hectic days. So, in the week before, we'll save an extra portion of everything we cook and freeze it.
Meanwhile Ben's weight is continuing to creep up slightly. He's put on half a kilo since the last scales session a fortnight ago. I'm not convinced he's totally happy with that, but I am.
It's going to be really hard watching Ben go to uni after we've spent so much time together over the past three years during his illness. But I am painfully aware that it's time to call it a day on the helicopter parenting and take more of a back seat. A discreetly watchful back seat. And, as a back-up, my sister works in Ben's uni city once or twice a week, so she can keep a discreet eye on him too.
On the bed in the spare room is a mounting pile of boxes and bags, packed with pots, pans, cutlery, crockery, food, toiletries, cleaning products and all the other stuff he'll need at uni. Add to this his bedding, clothes and study materials / stationery and we'll need to hire a truck to get him there!
This is his future and he is so excited about it - the future the eating disorder didn't want him to have, the new friends it didn't want him to make and the achievements it didn't want him to clock up.
But it's going to be so strange when he's gone.