Saturday, 22 July 2017

Another post where I was blissfully unaware of what was happening...

Here's another post which I wrote for that newspaper back in the summer of 2009 as I continued to be blissfully unaware that my son, Ben, was sinking into an eating disorder. Had I been aware that boys and men can get eating disorders, then the alarm bells might have been ringing, but it was a couple more months before they began to tinkle - purely and simply because I was completely ignorant of eating disorder symptoms, especially in boys. If you've read my book, Please eat...: A mother's struggle to free her teenage son from anorexia, you'll recognise some of this text which I adapted for one of the chapters.

Eight years ago my son was heading into an eating disorder, but I was blissfully unaware...

Eight years ago this summer, my 15-year old son, Ben, was beginning to descend into something that was way, way beyond anything that had ever entered my psyche; something worse than my worst nightmares. But of course I was blissfully unaware that he was developing a potentially deadly eating disorder: anorexia. What I was aware of, however, that Ben was getting increasingly fussy around food. Ben, who used to eat anything and everything, had suddenly become mega health-conscious and an expert on 'healthy' nutrition. He'd also developed a passion for cooking which, at the time, I applauded. I even found it amusing as can be seen from the following blog post which I wrote on the 22nd July 2009 (8 years ago today!!) as part of a series for a regional newspaper and which I was reminded of this afternoon as Ben pummelled the dough for pizza:

Thursday, 20 July 2017

Processing anger - and the cardboard BMI calculating wheel

During the 18 weeks I was with Steve, my EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing) therapist, we processed a ton of stuff relating to my son's eating disorder. (We picked out the key issues that were haunting / bugging me still in 2017 in the hope that, by focusing on these, other issues may get processed at the same time.) One of the major issues was anger. I mean, ANGER. Even A. N. G. .E. R. Anger at those in the medical profession who made my life more difficult as the parent of a teenage boy with anorexia and, I believe, may actually have prolonged my son's eating disorder.

Thinking about C-PTSD again... trying to make sense of it...

I thought I'd share something I posted on the Around The Dinner Table Forum (for parents of young people with eating disorders). A while ago I started a thread aimed at parents like me who may be suffering from post-trauma-related symptoms after years of battling with our child's eating disorder. It seems I'm not alone in experiencing typical PTSD symptons (or, rather, C-PTSD - Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). Other parents are struggling with this too. So here's what I wrote today (in the hope that it might strike a chord with someone and help in some way):

Saturday, 15 July 2017

In many ways I've fixed the PTSD but in other ways it's still very much around

It's not surprising, really, that some of us parents will find that the eating disorder comes back to haunt us in the guise of medical issues either with our body or with our mind. In his book The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma, world trauma expert Dr Bessel van der Kolk talks about how trauma literally reshapes both body and brain, "compromising sufferers' capacities for pleasure, engagement, self-control, and trust".

News release going out to local press / media in Yorkshire

Leeds mum invited to join the board of national men's eating disorders charity

A Leeds mum who became a campaigner after her teenage son developed anorexia has been invited to join the Board of a national men's charity tackling eating disorders. Bev Mattocks Osborne, who spent several years fighting to get her son through anorexia is joining the charity Men Get Eating Disorders Too (MGEDT) as a Trustee. Men Get Eating Disorders Too was founded in 2008 by Sam Thomas as a response to the lack of awareness and adequate information and support for men and boys battling with an eating disorder.

Thursday, 13 July 2017

Honoured to be invited to be a Trustee of the Men Get Eating Disorders Too charity

I've known Sam Thomas, founder of the charity Men Get Eating Disorders Too, for some time. We occasionally meet up at conferences and so on. Sam does an amazing job. Not only is he the founder of this incredible charity but he campaigns tirelessly across the country, on TV and radio and in the press to raise awareness of the fact that men get eating disorders. If there's a report about males and eating disorders, then the chances are that the reporter will be interviewing Sam!

Monday, 10 July 2017

Lots of things to catch up on!

It's all been a bit quiet here recently. That's because I've been focusing on fixing the C-PTSD (Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder) which I've been battling with for at least 3 years. After several therapists and therapy models, both NHS and private, I do believe it's finally been fixed (fingers crossed, famous last words and all that...) 18 sessions with Steve, my excellent private PTSD therapist (using EMDR - Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), seem to have worked wonders. Of course it's early days and I'm taking things slowly as I gradually rediscover who the heck I am after all this time and where I go from here. "Gradually" being the operative word. So more on this shortly...