Sunday 27 January 2019

I have been fighting the NHS for 10 years - it should never, ever have been like this. Not for us, not for anyone.

As I said to my H last night: "I would have been surprised if (a) the NHS had offered me further help for C-PTSD, and (b) if that help had been effective evidence-based treatment over a sufficient period of time for me to recover rather than being discharged after a handful of sessions way, way too soon. It shouldn't be like this, for anyone suffering from mental health issues whether that's an eating disorder like anorexia or bulimia or a condition like Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.

What is the point of (a) letting people get worse before they're treated and / or (b) discharging them far too soon because 'the powers that be' are only offering a limited handful of sessions, bearing in mind that the first few sessions are always going to be about getting to know the patient, explaining the legalities and also how the treatment will pan out.

Aside from making people suffer needlessly over long periods, or even causing fatalities if someone takes their own life or dies from, say, a complication of an eating disorder, it's a massive waste of money.

Another massive waste of money, and also potentially deadly, is for mental health professionals NOT to be up to date with the latest evidence-based treatment and to continue with older defunct methods, as was the case with my son's eating disorder treatment.

But most important of all, to you... to us... is that we're having to fight the very people who are supposed to be helping us!

At a time when we're fighting other stuff - like trying desperately to keep our children alive while a deadly eating disorder seeks to destroy them.

Or simply at a time when we, as parents, are trying to claw back something resembling the peace of mind we had before any of this happened.

As my H said to me last night: "This has happened to us twice now. First with you having to fight to get eating disorder treatment for Ben and now with you having to fight to get C-PTSD treatment for yourself - for a condition that, ironically, was partly caused by the former fight!!"

I feel as if I've been fighting the NHS for 10 years.

I have been fighting the NHS for 10 years.

And I no longer trust them an inch.

In all truth, I would have found it difficult to continue with NHS treatment for C-PTSD because part of my condition is about being SO VERY ANGRY with the NHS, the very people who would have been treating me and inviting me to 'open up' and talk about stuff.

In my C-PTSD mind, it's like opening up to the enemy. I want to thump them rather than 'open up' to them!!!

And now that I've been discharged because it's felt that no further C-PTSD treatment would be helpful while I'm still being triggered into flashback mode, my anger has reached boiling point.

How many times do I have to say that flashbacks are a major symptom of C-PTSD and PTSD!!!

As my H said last night, it's like someone being discharged from treatment for, say, cancer because they have developed a further suspicious lump - come back when the lump is gone and we may (or may not) consider treating you again...

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