So this is what I said to Ben as we walked from the car to Tesco's supermarket yesterday...
"Heck, I've been blogging about it and I thought it was time I told you to your face - I am so very proud of everything you've been doing since you left university last month. All those caveats we talked about in the coffee shop... you've kept to every single one of them - and more. And you've kept on going. There's no stopping you, Ben! Paid jobs, voluntary work, working at school, social life, clubs... you're doing it all. And you've asked for further treatment, because you yourself have admitted that you need it. Wow! I am so proud of you. I am thrilled. I am beyond thrilled!"
"I couldn't have done it without you, mum... I mean if I'd left uni and you'd just sighed and resigned yourself to me wasting my life or something like that...."
"I haven't done it, Ben, you've done it. You've done all this stuff yourself."
"I wouldn't have been able to do it without you..."
"We are a team, you and me. A strong team. We work together like a well-oiled machine."
"But I haven't really achieved much, regarding the jobs..."
"That's not your fault. There's a recession on. And you've done really well to have not one but two interviews for the Games Workshop job. You would have had an interview at Starbucks on Monday if it wasn't for the Starbucks reshuffle following the other shop's closure. And you're working at school once a week. Plus, you're actively pursuing all the voluntary jobs - only today the museum said they'd love to have you as a volunteer. Also S said there might be a vacancy going in the sandwich shop at the station. I'm impressed, Ben. Really impressed."
He gave me a great big hug.
Want information on eating disorders in boys? Worried your son has an eating disorder? What are the signs of eating disorders in boys? In 2009 my 15-year-old son developed anorexia. Now aged 31 and with a MSc in Psychology he is recovered & working in mental health using his experiences to help others. I help to raise awareness of eating disorders in boys, point parents to helpful resources & talk about how eating disorders can traumatise families.
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You've got one very brave boy there. Well done to you both!
ReplyDeleteThat's really lovely! And you're right, Ben's doing a fantastic job. And he's right too: your encouragement and support have been great.
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