Wednesday 20 April 2011

Something is up...

I get the impression he's resisting calories again after agreeing to increase them at CAHMS (because he'd maintained over the last fortnight we agreed he'd go OVER the required calories as many times as possible). He went over calories on Saturday by 200 but hasn't done so on any other day since then, despite coaxing from me... And over the last 48 hours he's been very "tetchy". Today he flew off the handle a couple of times and ended up in tears after shouting out a bit like he used to do... the kind of shouting that makes me jump out of my skin...


He seems to be avoiding his friends; he's thinking of cancelling the outing with them tomorrow; says he'd only "bore them"...

Something is up, and he won't talk about it.

I can always tell when he's not cooperating and something is wrong because he closes up... the blinds go down and we're not permitted in...

At times like this (thankfully few, these days) it takes me back to darker times one year ago.

It's half way through the school Easter holidays at the moment. He's avoiding his friends, yet he's getting stir crazy, trying to get us to go out and do things when, unfortunately, we have to work. Husband is still officially out of work, but is doing some freelancing which he has to do to get momey. Me, I'm having to work, too, to keep the wolf from the door, hence the reason why I haven't written any of my blog this week...

Echoes of last summer holidays... I start to dread this summer because if he's like this after 1.5 weeks, what the heck is he going to be like after 8 weeks of school holidays if he avoids his friends and doesn't take up all the other suggestions I'm always putting forward so he socialises with people his own age and doesn't get bored.

Most important of all... so he doesn't slip back into the hellish suicidal mood he was in for the whole of last summer...

Hopefully this is just a blip but at times like this when the "Evil ED" is speaking loudly in his ear it makes me feel so uneasy and worried we're undoing much of the good we've done.

But it's hopefully just a blip...

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