Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

I'm sitting here, face now dry, makeup now run, trying to work out for the life of me when it all started, why it all started and if it could have been avoided. Or would the anorexia have muscled into Ben's life regardless. In other words, was he doomed from the start?

Clearing out stuff and getting to the root of the problem

It started yesterday when I did a much-needed clear-out of the back bedroom. I went through a suitcase full of stuff I'd collected over the years: Ben's primary school reports, certificates and other stuff, and a mountain of stuff I'd collected over the last 7 years to form a lasting memory of his years at the senior school - the school we'd all dreamed of him getting a place at and which, before ED the anorexia 'demon' arrived, was rapidly becoming the making of Ben.

Okay, so this is Batty's NEXT plan...

Thank you, my brilliant blog followers, for coming straight back with some very sensible, helpful and practical advice on what to do about the insomnia / social / all the other disarray that the ED's left in its wake. This is what I've decided to do - and I've told Ben that I'm not 'asking' if he'd like to do it, but TELLING him that he needs to do it, so we're doing it, no objections allowed.

3rd day of missed school and A Levels less than a month away...

I know Ben managed to study almost exclusively at home for his GCSEs AND get really good results, but the school says it's very different for A Levels, especially with Ben having to resit some of last year's AS Level exams at the same time. Exams are less than a month away and he's only been in school for a total of 8 hours this week...

Plans A, B & C to deal with the anxiety and insomnia

Okay, so Ben is finding it harder than ever to go into school. His insomnia is back with a vengeance, fuelled by anxiety, which means he is missing large chunks of school. On top of this he has A Levels in a month's time. So what can be done? Well, I've come up with 3 x plans: A, B and C which I'm going to go through with him this afternoon to see if it will take some of the pressure off him.

At a loss what to do next...

And so the social isolation continues, and I can't help but feel it's mainly self-imposed isolation. If I thought that Ben was isolating himself from his peers a few months or even a year ago, it is now far, far worse. And, to be honest, I haven't a clue what to do.

Weight creeping up, but what does ED think of it?

Ben is almost up to 60kg which, in my eyes, is excellent. But I'm not so sure that it is in ED's eyes, that little bit of the eating disorder that's still left inside Ben's head, desperately trying for a last ditch attempt to win Ben back to its evil ways.

Would our Contract have worked earlier in the treatment?

Probably not. Because, at that stage, Ben - egged on by the Anorexia 'Demon' - was actively working against us. Like many people with anorexia, he was also a dab hand at pulling the wool over people's eyes. As I grew to know the Anorexia Demon's sneaky tricks, I could usually tell when Ben was lying to us, hiding food or throwing it away 'in secret'.

"Points STILL win prizes!"

Without doubt, one of the Number One drivers in moving Ben's recovery from anorexia forward over the past 13 months has been our Recovery Contract (see the tabbed link at the top or click here to find out more). I introduced it on 20th March 2011 after a mum in the States emailed me the Contract she uses for her daughter. It worked for them, so - fed up with being stuck in a kind of Limboland with Ben at the time - I decided to give it a try. We never looked back - and if you are looking for something to put the dynamite into your child's recovery, it might just work for you.

Okay, so what DID I get to say yesterday...

That's the trouble with 5 minute interviews - you simply don't have enough time to even get started, let alone say all you want to say. Also, the nature of interviews is that you also need time for the interviewer (here, Lorraine Kelly of GMTV) to ask the questions and comment on your replies. Plus time for any other person (in this case, GMTV's Dr Hilary Jones) to say their bit, too. Oh, and I almost forgot, (shame on me!) time for my son to talk about the descent into anorexia from his own perspective. After all, it's not all about Batty Matty!! So, in a nutshell, this is what I did - and didn't - cover on the Lorraine Kelly show yesterday.

Talking about anorexia in boys with Lorraine Kelly...

Batty and 'Ben' appeared on ITV's 'Lorraine' with Lorraine Kelly today (just after GMTV's Daybreak programme (Tuesday 17th April), talking about the frightening rise of anorexia in boys (which the media sometimes call 'manorexia', on the Lorraine programme our slot was entitled 'Tackling Manorexia'). Anyway, we've just got back home after a long, long, long day with Lorraine Kelly and everyone (actually we were only in the ITV studio for a couple of hours, and with Lorraine Kelly for 5 or 6 minutes), and - boy - are we seriously tired!!

So this is what I plan to say (in case I don't manage to say it)...

Firstly, yes the TV is going ahead. Secondly, this is what I plan to say - just in case I get sidetracked, get stage fright or don't have enough time to say it...

Our story is important, but maybe not as important as theirs...

The latest news on the telly appearance on Tuesday morning is that it's 'on hold' and we won't find out until Monday morning, just hours before our train is due to leave for London, if it's going ahead of not.

More about Tuesday

I'll see if I can get some kind of video clip sent to me that I can stick on here or on Youtube rather than just relying on catchup TV.

All will be revealed on Tuesday morning...

Batty and Ben have been invited to appear on ITV's Good Morning show with Lorraine Kelly on Tuesday morning - an interview set up to highlight the growing number of teenage boys being diagnosed with anorexia and other eating disorders. We have a 6-8 minute slot so it will be like trying to cram a king size duvet into a mobile phone pouch. And, of course, viewers will see us under our real names.

Been down with a horrible fluey bug for over a week...

My punishment for juggling too many balls recently, me thinks, but I've been really poorly this week. Thankfully I'm a lot better today and Ben has been so sweet looking after me, serving up non-stop home-made 'comfort food' from mini Chelsea buns, chocolate brownies and chocolate mini egg nests to apple crumble and custard, sticky chewy datey bars and amaretti biscuits to dunk in reviving cocoa. And, yes, he has been eating these things too - and more, including the twice weekly Graze Box I now get for him.