One thing that made us all giggle at last weekend's FEAST conference was when we were talking about the good endorphins that people get from doing exercise. Except that one mum got her tongue twisted and came out with "endolphins" instead which made everyone laugh - because we'd been talking about the the different animal personae that carers adopt - Janet Treasure's "dolphin" being the ideal one i.e. you guide and encourage your child slowly and discreetly through the rough seas towards recovery.
By the end of yesterday I was bursting with "endolphins". I was tired, I'd been incredibly anxious all day but was keen not to show it. All Ben saw (hopefully) was a calm "dolphin" who was encouraging him to face his fears and get through the day.
And I'm delighted to say he managed it.
Yes, he found it difficult working on a busy Friday lunchtime shift, surrounded by people eating fantastic food. But he managed to structure his own eating around the shift - and get through it. For a while he tried to get out of going to Phab in the evening ("Mum, do I have to go to Phab?" "Yes you do." "What if I can't move by then?")
But he went to that too - and had an early evening meal with puddings and snacks when he got back home at 9pm.
On the way back from Phab I adopted Gill Todd's "affirmation"-style talking, learned last weekend. "I'm aware how difficult today was for you, Ben, but I just thought I should let you know how proud I am of you that you did it." etc.
And today Ben is fine.
Want information on eating disorders in boys? Worried your son has an eating disorder? What are the signs of eating disorders in boys? In 2009 my 15-year-old son developed anorexia. Now aged 31 and with a MSc in Psychology he is recovered & working in mental health using his experiences to help others. I help to raise awareness of eating disorders in boys, point parents to helpful resources & talk about how eating disorders can traumatise families.
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thank you for giving your readers some endolphins back! Glad yesterday went OK. I'm still trying to practice that affirmation style! It's difficult with our children, but harder with some adults I know!
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